Sunday, March 2, 2008

A Pretty Good Day

It is Sunday the day after my Avonex shot. I decided to take my Provigil to see how I would feel. Well I feel pretty good. I don't feel like sleeping and I feel pretty good. I would say this is the best I have felt on a Sunday since taking the Avonex. I went 2 days without Provigil, Friday I went without it because I was suppose to get an ultrasound and they had told me to have an empty stomach, by the time I got home it was too late to take it. Saturday I went to the MS Women's Conference and just forgot. I can definitely tell the difference from taking the Provigil and not taking it. I ended up falling asleep around 5 until 8pm. The Women's Conference was really fun and I learned some new things about the disease. I also met some new people which was nice.
One woman told me she was very angry for the first 6 months after she was diagnosed, that made me feel much better about the way I have been feeling. I have been a very angry person for the last 5 months doing things out of character and treating my husband unfairly. He has been so supportive through this whole ordeal and I have been very difficult to be around; moody, angry, and down right rude to him. I have been working on my anger issues and I am trying to be a more fun person to be around. It's going better, I realized being angry about things I can't change is not helping me, it just makes me more depressed and unhappy. I have this disease and there is nothing I can do about it, so there is no reason to be angry about it anymore. I need to make the best of what I have. I have a wonderful husband, good friends, and a family that is being really supportive. I have decided being angry with things I have no control over, only causes more problems. I don't want to be an angry person, I want to be a happy person. So my short term goal is to try to be a happier person.
Things are going pretty well, I am feeling a lot better with this fatigue drug, which is improving my mood tremendously which is helping me to be a happier person. I will write more later.

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